These self-care tips will turn your life around

Updated on: 19 December 2021, 15:27 pm IST

We need to start prioritising self care over trying to conform to and shape our life as per people's expectations. That will set us on a positive path.

Devina Kaur
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Knowing who you are and what you want can be life-changing. Image courtesy: Shutterstock
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I spent many of my adult years trying to find a part of me that was missing. However, I had absolutely no idea what I was looking for. I realized that before I could look for someone else, I needed to find myself. That self-care was important.

Realizing the need for self-care

Being born and raised in India, I was the traditional Indian girl, doing exactly what my parents wanted me to do. Finish your education, get a well paying job and lose weight so that you can become more and more marketable as a woman. As women, we are often told that our first priority should be the success of our significant other. We are told not to be too ambitious but study hard enough so that you can get a good job. We are often labeled as being too much, too fat, too loud and too ambitious. In our Indian culture we are told that our first priority should always be our family, having children, pleasing our husbands and our in-laws. What I learned is that the minute we become dependent on somebody else for our well-being and our livelihood, we lose our own inner spiritual power and wisdom.

Deep down, after 30 years of being told who I was, I lost my authentic self. It took going through a divorce and being a full-time single mother to realize that there is more to life than just fitting into “log kya kahenge” –  what people expected of me. After a lot of self-study, overcoming an addiction and looking within myself, I have learnt that unless we know who we are and then ask for what we want the chances are slim that the universe will deliver it to us.

Most of us don’t even know what we want, because we are living other people’s lives and dreams. So before we go into what we want my question to you is: who are you? Do you know your good side? Do you know your not so good side? And from there can you practice radical self-acceptance?

How to get onto the path of self-care?

1. Radical self-acceptance

Acceptance is the path to development. There are moments in life when growth is slow, but we believe that the path of existence is varied, multiple and contains opportunities for everyone. Radical self-acceptance comes from unlearning all your previous conditioning, programming and the messages that tell you that you have to be a certain way to fit in and be liked by others.

2. Unlearn

The most successful people in the world are those who are quick to unlearn from their bad experiences and relearn from the new ones. When acknowledging the messages that do not help us in our spiritual growth and personal development, we can then replace those messages with more empowered and authentic messages. If you ever have doubts look at the mirror and proclaim “always sexy, always brilliant”.

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Remember, self-care is also important. Image courtesy: Shutterstock

3. Sexy inner wisdom

The real wisdom lies in knowing that we are all divine sexy brilliant creatures, living a shared human experience, while co-creating our future. So dare to dream big, see the invisible in order to achieve the impossible. Now is the time to acknowledge that the only guru we need and have ever needed is within ourselves.

We have the power to manifest whatever and whoever we want. The universe is always listening. So demand more, be clear on who you are and then ask for what you want. There is a 100 percent chance that the universe will deliver when you give a definite timeline, specify what you want and stay firm in your request.

Question who you are before you try to figure out what you want out of life. Spend time in stillness in silence and let the divine sexy light lead you to find your inner spiritual power and wisdom. When you gain spiritual confidence you begin to live an abundant, authentic and empowered life, and it all starts with self-knowledge.

Devina Kaur Devina Kaur

Devina Kaur is an inspirational speaker, radio host, and producer. She is also the author of the self-help book called "Too Fat Too Loud Too Ambitious".

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