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How to find joy and happiness in being single

Published on:28 January 2021, 17:09pm IST
You might feel being single is the most unfortunate thing that has happened to you, but being unattached can help you gain positive experiences and aid in personal growth.
Geetika Sachdev
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feeling guilty
Don’t feel miserable for being single. Image courtesy: Shutterstock

We’ve all heard of how happiness is not subject to external circumstances. You might have the best relationship or have everything right going on in your life, and yet you can be unhappy. That’s why it is important to focus inward and work on yourself, and you can do that best when you’re single. Don’t get us wrong: we don’t mean to say that being in a relationship will curb your self-growth. But when you are single, you have the time and space to work on yourself. And this is certainly one of the biggest positives of being single. 

Popular media has projected ‘singledom’ to be a weakness. Rather, it is all about having the strength and patience to wait for the right person. There are many people who think being single is about being lonely, because guess what? Your happiness isn’t dependent on your relationship status. 

We know it isn’t easy to stay single, because of how society views it to be. But don’t think about what other people say! Instead, try and focus on what you want, and how you can enjoy this phase in the best way possible, until it lasts. 

So, are you ready to know all about it?

1. Involve yourself in things you enjoy

As per research, happiness is not about your relationship status, but how you choose to spend your time. Because you can be lonely and sad, even when you are with someone. Living a life full of happiness requires you to practice meaningful activities, a good social network, and practicing mindfulness.

being single
Loving yourself is the best! Image: Shutterstock

Mindfulness is all about being present in the moment, and enjoying all kinds of experiences. Say you might be at your favourite concert, but if you are thinking about how someone else is better than you, then you’d never be able to enjoy this moment. That’s why it is all about you and what you think!

2. Practice self-love

You might think this advice is so done to death, but unfortunately, even if this has been repeated a million times, it isn’t the easiest to follow it. That’s why we suggest you focus on yourself and practice some TLC that makes you feel great about who you are. You really don’t need to feel worthy only if someone else gives you validation. Being single is an opportunity to fall in love with yourself first. So, give yourself a little hug and start loving yourself a little more!

3. Don’t wait to be in a relationship to fulfil your life goals

You might think that being in a relationship might give you all the happiness, and it will completely change your life. You think you will start doing things you’ve been avoiding for a long time, but guess what? That doesn’t happen! So whatever be your life goals, pursue them now and don’t wait for someone to just come into your life and make things happen for you. You are in charge of your life, so you better do what you want!

4. Your past is important, but let it not sabotage your future

It’s true that our past relationships have a deep impact on our present, sometimes so much so that the thought of falling in love makes you cringe. First of all, try and do everything possible to get away from your ex, and that means unfollowing them or blocking them on social media. You also need to stop talking to your friends about your ex or even trying to know what they are upto!

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The other thing is to stop comparing your ex with every person that you go on a date with. Maybe, your ex was hotter, but this person who you just met has a much kinder heart. See this person for who he is, instead of comparing! Instead, if you are thinking of qualities that you want in a partner, maybe try and think of those that you didn’t like in your ex, so that you don’t repeat those patterns.

5. View life with a positive lens

Yes, life is hard, but it also has some great things to offer. Try to keep yourself away from negative vibes, and you are going to live much longer and happier, and feel more positive. Being pessimistic is only going to make matters worse for you, so see the positive instead of viewing everything with a negative lens. Optimism attracts happiness, so try and practice that and good people will be drawn to you.

Geetika Sachdev Geetika Sachdev

An independent writer and journalist, Geetika loves sharp and fresh humour, just like her coffee! If not writing, you'll find her cafe-hopping and raiding the best book stores in town.