We have all been body-shamed in our lives – whether we are fat or skinny; our stomachs aren’t flat or our thighs are too big! Everything about our body attracts unnecessary attention and suggestions on how to lose weight. Sadly, such comments from strangers as well as loved ones leave a lot of people with a sense of low self-esteem. In my case, such fat-shaming and comments about my body and my size led me to struggle with bulimia. Over 15 years later, I am still in recovery mode and striving toward becoming body confident.
The thing to remember is that people unknowingly hurt us with their words. Even as young girls, we try to understand and make sense of such comments but physiologically, we start entertaining those unwelcome comments. We believe that people commenting on the size of our bodies is who we are. We start to look at our bodies differently, judge ourselves, and starve our bodies till we are on the brink of a breakdown. Remember what people think about you and your bodies is their opinion, it is not who you are.
With all the unwelcome comments we hear all day, we start doubting ourselves. We stop noticing our beautiful parts and think of them as ugly and unwanted. I was told my entire childhood that I was too fat and no man would want to take home a fat, short bride, which stuck with me. To get rid of this, I devised a routine to take mirror selfies every day and compliment myself, chatting to myself that I am a sexy person. I would stand in front of the mirror and repeat “Always sexy, always brilliant” After a while, I stopped seeing my curves as flaws but accepted them wholeheartedly. This brought about a shift in my life.
Now, whenever I feel overwhelmed, I click a picture of myself and remind myself just how gracefully and divinely I carry myself and you can do that too. Stand in front of the mirror and admire yourself for how divine you are. Do it every day till it becomes your reality.
One of the main ways we send social signals is through our choice of clothes. How we use colours, tones, and accessories is a great way to harness the power of inner confidence. People often tell us what clothes will suit us the best and what would not. This hinders your decision of what to wear when you go shopping or while dressing up. Next time you go shopping, pick out the outfit that you’d want to wear and buy a shade of lipstick that you like.
Spending time on your outer appearance will add inner confidence. Be unapologetic when you wear your choice of clothes and add accessories as you please. As you feel a rush of excitement, your face glows and you feel like you can conquer the world. Remember to follow your instincts when shopping. Take care of the way you talk about your body to yourself, as this is the first step to become body confident.
Our minds are affected by the people we surround ourselves with, the news we intake, and the ideas we entertain in our minds. Some of them bring about a positive impact but some affect us negatively. Spend time with yourself so you know when you’ve started shaming yourself or when the company is becoming toxic. Release yourself from toxicity and embrace positivity in your life. Tailor your social media feed to be more productive, choose friends who love you for what you are, and not try to damage you at every step of your life. Release what no longer serves you to feel more body confident.
As we become body confident, start loving, caring, and respecting ourselves and our bodies, we are treated the same way. We should aim to treat others with the same kindness so we can all unleash our sexy brilliant divine selves for the world to see and admire.
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