A research conducted in May 2019 found that the post-break-up emotional state closely resembles the symptoms of clinical depression. Another one conducted at the University of Missouri, Columbia stated that on-again, off-again relationships are toxic for one’s mental health. In fact, several studies have suggested that a bad break-up can trigger mental health condition.
The mind surely knows all this, but unfortunately, the heart still doesn’t relent. However, if you’re aware of the following toxic dating behaviours, maybe you can protect your heart and well—your mental health from a lot of toxicity and torture:
No, this has nothing to do with Mr. Prince Charming making you go crazy while doing bench presses. Benching is a dating trend where the person is not exactly interested in committing to you, but also doesn’t want to let you go. Basically, you’re like khichdi for him and he will come to you only when his “other” options are closed.
Literally speaking, you’re like that twelfth man of a cricket team sitting on the bench, hoping to be a part of the playing at eleven someday. You can imagine the kind of anxiety that sportswoman must be facing while waiting to get her due after all the hard work she’s put in. So, you can well imagine how this anxiety can increase ten folds when feelings and love—oops!—one-sided love is involved.
Don’t let the name mislead you into thinking that this dating trend is all about his love magically giving you the voluptuous body of your dreams. All bad jokes apart, curving can give you a broken with some anxiety, simply because your partner will ignore you subtly without verbally expressing his disinterest in you in those many words. In fact, he could turn into a cow and respond with hmmms and other conversation-enders during most of the chats and leave you guessing.
If your love interest suddenly goes Mr. India on you without any explanation or a formal break-up–you’ve been ghosted, girl! Again, anxiety, depression, and sometimes even a shaken self-confidence is likely to ensure.
Just when you come to terms with Mr. India going MIA suddenly, he makes a comeback with a casual DM on social media. Be warned, the message will have no apology or explanation about why he went missing in the first place. His return also means constant reminders of the past and more confusion for the future. It goes without saying that it will only mess up your mental health further.
You know the concept of ‘trophy wives’ and ‘gold diggers’ already, so it shouldn’t come as a surprise that people date people who they think are good for their social standing. Throning is just that! Not only does this mean having to constantly live with the pressure of “being adequate” for them and their social stature–but also nursing a broken heart once you realise it wasn’t love.
That brunch with you might just be the worst date of their lives, but they will make it sound like it was the best they’ve ever had. Beware of these “exaggerators” and “exgger-daters”–who get your hopes high in the beginning, only to leave you wondering where you went wrong once they go poof!
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When your partner is more obsessed with publicizing his relationship on social media than with the relationship itself, you need to know you’ve been insta-gated. Needless to say, all show-off and no spark, makes relationship a dull ploy.
When the guy’s leaving subtle hints about his interest in you, but isn’t exactly backing it up with actions or intentions to continue the budding relationship–he’s breadcrumbing you. Crushed hopes and god forbid, crushed confidence, is just what you might end up with.
This one’s more common than Virat Kohli’s hair cut. The person exaggerates his qualities on his social media or dating website profile just to seem more appealing and turns out to be quite the opposite in reality. Again, raised expectations and disappointment to cope with!