Shipra Dawar, founder of India’s leading online mental health platform, shares the secret to becoming your own BFF

This pandemic has actually shown us how important it is to rely on ourselves, both physically and mentally. We’ve all been locked down in our homes, with no friends to meet. That’s why it is all the more important for you to be your own best friend.

But why is it so important to befriend yourself?

That’s a valid question and before we reveal how to befriend yourself, it’s important to understand why it is needed in the first place. To answer your query we have Shipra Dawar, CEO & founder of IWILL and ePsyClinic, a leading mental health care provider. 

Ms Dawar suggests that if you know yourself well, then half of the problems get solved in an instant. 

She also pointed out that most of us are overly critical about ourselves, so much so that even after a minor hiccup in our lives, we look for support. But if you are your own support system, then there is no problem at all.  

“Just like you are always emotionally available for your friend, you can be available for yourself. With this approach, you can also succeed in maintaining healthy relations. You can easily avoid conflict,  as your mental and emotional health is in control. Also, it helps you navigate better, as if you are your own GPS”, she gleefully explains.

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Here are four simple tricks that will help you become your own friend. Ms Dawar terms it as the ‘LEAN’ approach:

1. Love yourself

Just the way you feel concerned for your best friend, feel for yourself too. You never want anything wrong to happen to your buddy, so think similarly for yourself. Talk to yourself, say positive affirmations, praise yourself, and if something is bothering you, then coach yourself.

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“Look towards yourself with the same eyes as your BFF looks at you or vice-versa. It has the power to heal you emotionally, and a lot of mental health issues can be resolved there and then”, suggests Ms Dawar.

2. Encouragement and empathy

When it comes to your friends, you always encourage and appreciate them, then what’s the harm if you do the same for yourself? Pampering yourself or showing self-love is not at all obsessive, but much needed today.

“There is no issue in telling yourself what good you do, and where you lack and need improvement. Also, when your friend fails and you give them both empathy and time, give the same to yourself”, she said.

3. Be assertive

“This is very simple — if you can’t stand up for yourself, then no one will ever value you. So, open up and speak up for yourself. The problem is people don’t realise that most of the emotional issues can be resolved by speaking about it”, she suggested.

4. Nurture yourself

Nurturing is a very crucial step and it should be progressive in nature. You should keep pushing and appreciating yourself to reach your peak potential.

“Awareness and self-doubt can’t co-exist, and it can be the biggest hindrance of all. Look out for all the good in you and nurture it. This will help you move towards growth and achievement. Things will start looking good”, suggests Ms Dawar.

The last word

We need to understand that we are careful about what we feed our minds. We have to practice these tricks consistently to take charge of our lives. Do you know you won’t feel lonely, if you consider yourself to be your best friend?

“Mental health issues happen when you feel lonely. This feeling is replaced with calmness, which helps in the longer run, if you consider yourself to be your BFF. In the short run, day to day happenings can throw you off your feet. If you practice these tips,  things won’t affect you negatively, and your mood won’t fluctuate way too often”, she said.

“Ups and downs will come and go. All you have to do is embrace yourself, follow these tips, and be your best friend for life”, concludes Ms Dawar.