Love is as fluid an emotion as it is powerful. As a society, we sometimes try too hard to put it in black and white moulds. But love is several shades of grey – far removed from the idea of the acceptable or the expected. And so, I agree when IPL commissioner Lalit Modi, who stirred up a social media storm with his “better half” reference for former Miss Universe Sushmita Sen, says, “If chemistry is right and timing is good, magic can happen.”
Be it the Modi-Sen camaraderie or the return of Bennifer; they give us a reality check about the many possibilities of love.
“Love is beautiful. Love is kind. And it turns out love is patient. Twenty years patient,” international singer Jennifer Lopez wrote on her blog after her nuptials with Hollywood star Ben Affleck. Lopez has been married thrice before, while Affleck was earlier married to Jennifer Garner.
The star couple had a whirlwind romance in 2002, which is also the year they first got engaged to be married in 2003. But they ended up in a split. Years later, they rekindled their romance. Turns out that love can certainly find its way again!
Modern-day instances, perhaps more out and about in today’s world than before, are a blow to Bollywood’s love stereotype, ‘Pyaar ek baar hota hai’.
Look around! Closer home, we have Malaika Arora who found love in Arjun Kapoor after being married to Arbaaz Khan for several years. There’s Hrithik Roshan who is now in a relationship with Saba Azad, after splitting from Sussanne Khan, his wife of 14 years. Saif Ali Khan, who married Kareena Kapoor, years after separating from Amrita Singh, mother to two of his children. Katrina Kaif, who left a million hearts broken when she married Vicky Kaushal. Ranbir Kapoor and Alia Bhatt, who had their share of romances before finding ‘ishq waala love’ in each other! There are so many more.
‘Old school’ people call it “modern love”, but well, love is love after all!
A phase during my childhood saw me flipping through a booklet of Kim Casali’s world-famous comic strip “Love is…”. For the unversed, it features love notes, expressing the little things that love truly is.
So, when the social media universe discusses the perceived complexities of age gaps, gold digging and multiple weddings, it reminds me of those little things. “Love digger” Sushmita Sen’s choice of “noise cancellation” and declaration of simply being in a “happy space”, reaffirms that love is an emotion to be enjoyed and not judged.
Here are five of my favourite lines from the ‘Love is…’ comic strip, which make sense for love in all shapes, forms and sizes!
When you’re with someone you truly love, you should never feel the need to put on a face. Be yourself and let your guard down to feel the love for real. It feels empowering.
Not every love story will be straightforward and simple. The path may be pebbled or curvy, but take that chance if your heart urges you to. Your mind may make you have hiccups about dating someone from a different cultural or financial background, someone with a past or even if it’s about exploring your sexual preference. But go for it, if your heart says you must. And as Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck have proved, love is also about giving it a second chance!
When love strikes, you know it’s where you will find the calm to the storm in your mind. A simple hug, a forehead kiss, a comforting “I’m there”, go a long way in strengthening the emotion love is.
Communication is key to all relationships, but it is paramount when it comes to your partner. Expressing what you feel about being with the person, or even not wanting to be with a person anymore, is a crucial part of a bond. So, express more.
Trolls can go on and on about women being gold diggers. But as cliched as it may sound, in true love, you do realize that it’s the little things that count. Watching the sun go down together, cooking together, watching a movie in bed, having that morning cup of tea or coffee, holding hands, butterflies in the stomach…yes, all of that, even years after falling in love.
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