We might start our day on a super positive note, all set to spring into action, but during the day, we might sense our moods drop. While some of this might be natural, it is also possible that there are some habits that make us unhappy. Things like overthinking, stressing out, having expectations, constantly comparing ourselves to others are just some of the habits that make us unhappy. We might not even realise it, but if we manage to eliminate these habits from our day, we might find ourselves more joyful.
So, if you are wondering how to make your days brighter, identify the reasons that make you unhappy and replace them with everything that makes you happier, suggests psychologist and emotional wellness coach Anisha Jhunjhunwala.
Overthinking is one of the biggest habits that make us unhappy. “When we have a problem-centric mindset, we are constantly rethinking our actions. We focus on negative thoughts and overanalyse situations can lead to living in a state of anticipation and worry. To stop this shift from a problem-oriented to a solution-oriented perspective,” says Junjunwala. For instance, if you’re stressing about a work deadline, instead of fixating on potential problems, break down tasks into manageable steps and focus on completing each one efficiently.
Another habit that makes us unhappy is stress. Stressing over minor situations can be mitigated by developing the wisdom to discern the significance of different issues. “It is very important to set boundaries and understand which people and situations should we allow to impact our well-being. Consider an example where a friend’s comment affects your mood,” says Jhunjhunwala. Engaging in internal dialogue helps determine the significance of their opinion. By setting a boundary on how much influence external remarks should have, you maintain emotional balance.
Clinging to past grievances limits the ability to live in the present, fostering constant rumination over past events. “Imagine holding a grudge against a friend for a past disagreement. Reflecting on the impact, you decide to let go, freeing yourself from the mental burden. This act of forgiveness creates space for a more positive and fulfilling present,” explains Jhunjhunwala.
Procrastination is one of the habits that make us unhappy. Delays in tasks often have underlying reasons, such as a lack of enjoyment or perceived difficulty. Understanding the root cause of procrastination is crucial. “Consider a scenario where you procrastinate a challenging project. Identifying the difficulty, seek assistance or break the task into smaller steps, making it more manageable and easing the procrastination,” says Jhunjhunwala.
Constantly comparing oneself to others diverts attention from personal growth, akin to driving while focusing on other cars instead of one’s own road. “We all have been in a situation where are scrolling through social media and we end up feeling inadequate. Shifting focus inward, you celebrate your own accomplishments,” says Jhunjhunwala. By concentrating on your unique journey, you avoid unnecessary collisions with the distractions of external comparisons, fostering a sense of contentment.
Building healthy habits requires conscious effort and a commitment to personal well-being. “We need to focus on what causes unhappiness in our lives and how we can change this. By incorporating positive practices into our daily lives, we can create a foundation for lasting contentment and happiness,” says Jhunjhunwala. But we need to be at it, giving up too soon is a habit that will make us unhappy.
In the hustle of our daily routines, it is easy to get lost in the tasks at hand and lose touch with our inner selves. “This disconnect can lead to challenges in understanding our thoughts and feelings, potentially resulting in feelings of unhappiness and the development of unhealthy habits,” says Jhunjhunwala.
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