Emotional intimacy is important in love, and we’re telling you 5 ways to build it

Do you feel the emotional connection, happiness, and depth in your relationship? Well, for a successful and healthy relationship, it’s really important you feel emotionally connected to your partner. However, if you feel that your relationship lacks emotional intimacy, there are ways that can help you build it.

When most of us hear the word intimacy in a relationship, we often associate it with physical intimacy. It is because according to a US-based psychology specialist Dr Nicole LePera, most of us never saw how emotional intimacy looked between two people, and that’s why they struggled to feel close to their partners. Due to this, they may end up feeling alone, isolated, or misunderstood

But in order to have a lasting relationship, you need to evoke that deep, intense feeling of emotional attraction.

Dr LePera says, “Building emotional intimacy with our partners takes work. It’s something that we have to be open to throughout our relationship.”

How can you improve emotional intimacy with your partner?

“Asking to get our needs met, sharing our true emotions, plus saying kind things to our partners might feel very awkward. That’s okay. We can all work through the discomfort,” says Dr LePera.

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So follow these 5 tips suggested to increase emotional intimacy with your partner:

1. Tell your partner something you appreciate about them

Yes ladies, up the appreciation! In a relationship, communication is key. But to build emotional intimacy, it is really important that you try to make your partner feel good about what they do and that is unique to them. That will make a big difference!

You can appreciate your partner in these ways:
* I love how you’re so passionate about things you’re into
* I love how you see the best in situations
* I love how you appreciate the little things
* I love how you care so much about the people around you

2. For an hour or so each week, do something outside of your scheduled norm

Whether it’s your morning coffee or your after work gym session, spend some time together. To create emotional intimacy, focus on small, easy, and meaningful actions in your relationship. While spending some time with each other try to express your thoughts, feelings, and opinions and listen to your partner as well. This will help you understand your partner and you’ll get closer to your partner.

To spend some time together, you can:

* Try a new hike
* Go to a new restaurant that just opened plant a garden in your yard
* Create something together
* Learn something together that you’re both passionate about

3. Work on actively listening to what your partner is saying without interruption

In a relationship, it is really important that you learn to listen to each other. Why? Well everyone wants to be heard! So as your partner. Dr LePera says, “This might be difficult if the conversation is uncomfortable or emotionally overwhelming. But the more you practice this, the more your partner will feel heard, which is the foundation of emotional intimacy.” So pay attention to your partner and listen!

4. Tell your partner what you feel, or share your vulnerabilities

It can be easy to blame your partner for something. But doing so is harmful to your relationship. Even if you’re right, try to express yourself with the right words. Dr LePera says instead of saying “You were being such a jerk or you never care about my feelings” say “When you do that, it makes me feel insecure and worried about if you still care about me.” This will help you build emotional intimacy in your relationship.

5. Notice how often you’re critical and start to focus on what you do want from your partner

To build the emotional connection, give your partner hints or tell him/her about your needs. But while doing so do not question or blame your partner for not fulfilling your needs.

For example,  instead of saying, “You really just aren’t romantic” or “I wish you could just make me feel special”, try saying, “I like compliments or words of affirmations, could you try saying them?” or “I find it really romantic when you run me a bath + light candles, would you be willing to do that?”

So ladies, follow these simple tips and you’ll see a change in your relationship!