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When a relationship begins, it’s all hunky-dory, isn’t it? After all, there are butterflies in the stomach, anticipating a sweet romance. Oh and coming to sex, it’s all so exciting and magical! Of course, you want to try out new things in the bedroom with your partner, but things tend to become vanilla, as time progresses. You may feel that your sex life isn’t as much fun, and your relationship is not going to last.
First of all, heave a sigh of relief because this is more common than you think. That’s because you do not experience the kind of infatuation you felt in the beginning. Moreover, with time, other things take centre stage and your priorities change. This could affect your mood and make you a little distant from sex; now, that doesn’t mean you don’t love your partner.
The other reason for this one gets satiated with their partner, so the whole cycle of pursuing or getting enticed just reduces. It’s quite natural, and is no one’s fault. In certain cases, aging and medical issues also cause trouble, and bring down the libido.
Remember your relationship won’t crumble, if you have a strong emotional connection. Just that you will have to make some conscious efforts to get back intimacy into your life. There’s no denying that sex is important in a relationship, because having an orgasm releases oxytocin, which is a feel good hormone. Let’s just say bonding and sexual intimacy are both correlated. But it isn’t that you need to have sex a certain number of days in a week. It is the quality that matters too, and it varies from person to person.
As the name suggests, maintenance sex is all about having sex to maintain your relationship. That doesn’t mean that you have to plan it well in advance. It is about taking that plunge, and once you do it, most of the time, the experience is positive. Getting started is what is generally hard for couples. In certain cases, couples are not synced in their sex drive. Some might want it more frequently, others might not want it as often.
Lastly, couples need a level of verbal and psychological intimacy, before they enjoy sexual intimacy in the bedroom. Maintenance sex is a step in the right direction, because it enables you to speak about your needs and desires, both in and outside the bedroom.
Couples must definitely speak about what they want, and why they aren’t having sex as often. The dialogue can also include making plans of what they want to do with each other. It makes couples look at their lives in a certain manner, and gives them a different perspective.
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